What is it about us humans that crave affirmation? We hunger for feelings of acceptance, kudos and praise. Even confident individuals need positive feedback.
I feel like I have been bombarded with examples of that this week…individuals (myself included) needing to hear the good stuff. And yet at times, we need correction. Why is it sooo hard to hear those words?
My hubby and I entered the roles of “Secret Diners” last week, working for a restaurant group as raters…we dined on a full meal of apps, entrees and dessert…then spent time writing up our review. I used all of my fluffy foodie language to describe our experience, feeling a bit proud and puffed up. And then the review was edited…with red lines and questions and suggestions for improvement. Seriously? Even though she said, “Thank you for your first rating! Nice job on this one!” All I saw were my errors.
In my work, I must provide the constructive feedback to staff. I do my best to send my gratitude and highlight their strengths…and then I need to address the changes that need to be made. Uggh. This often occurs in emails…so I do not have the opportunity to be face to face when I share this…and sooooo much is lost in translation through an email. It feels awkward and puts individuals on the defense. Not my favorite thing to do.
So…what is the deal with this? How do I open myself up for receiving feedback…and how do I continue to provide the feedback needed without crushing spirits?
And here is what I intend to do…